Part of the following was borrowed from an inspiration I receive daily. I have added a few thoughts, and reworded some of it to better fit our circumstances.
Many survivors learned perfectionism as a tool to cope, find acceptance, prove to ourselves that we are worth something, and to hide our pains stemming from the abuse. Part of the ego reduction necessary to our healing is the acceptance of the fact that we are not and never will be perfect. Perfectionism gets in the way of healing because it imposes impossible, unrealistic goals which guarantee failure. If we do not think we have to be perfect, then we can accept our mistakes as learning experiences and be willing to try again.
Has perfectionism been a part of your coping tools? How so? Have you been able to overcome the feeling of having to be perfect? Does it still sneak in?
